"Charm is deceptive, and beauty is fleeting...

...but a woman who fears the Lord is to be praised" - Prov 31:30

Taipei is a very vain city (I wonder if this is true for all large cities...). You can just tell from the millions of beauty products, accessories, etc. that are on the shelves and everywhere you go. Girls and guys both really care about their appearance. Taiwan's professional photography/glamour shots are famous for making people look flawless and perfect for a really cheap price. People from all over Asia go to Taiwan to have their wedding pictures taken...not to mention all the young people who go back to Taiwan from the US to take glamour photos.

It's embarrassing to admit, but I am (or was) one of those people. Wanting to keep some memories of being in my 20s and with the possibility of huge changes in the future keeping me from coming back to Taiwan anytime soon, I also decided to take some glamour shots this time around in Taipei. Deep inside of me, however, there were other reasons too...not having ever really been photogenic or having high self-esteem about my appearance, I realized that I was looking for these photos to boost my self-confidence...to show me how beautiful I was because I myself was so unsure (because it seemed that no matter what people looked like, they always seemed to look pretty in those pictures that I saw)....
However, as I was sitting there along with another girl who was definitely more gorgeous than I was in every way, in that chair while the makeup artist did my makeup and such, Prov 31:30 popped into my head.

"Charm is deceptive and beauty is fleeting, but a woman who fears the Lord is to be praised"

And I suddenly had a revelation. These photos would never satisfy me and give me the affirmation that I hungered for. In fact, if I continued with the attitude that I had, the photos would probably fail miserably and never meet my impossible expectations in my eyes and I would sink even lower than before. Not only that, the photo shoot probably wouldn't even go very well since I myself didn't think I was beautiful enough to be photographed...what I mean by that is, I realized that people actually have to already think they're beautiful before they will photograph beautifully. The camera actually captures what the subject thinks of themselves. If you're uncertain about your appearance, it shows up on film. It takes a certain amount of self-esteem and self-confidence to be photographed which I don't think many people realize. For if they don't have that confidence and they look for the photo to give it to them, then they've got it backwards. Photos can only contribute to confidence that is already there; they will only detract if the confidence is not there.
Outer beauty is fleeting and shallow. It has no value. Real beauty is inner beauty...that's what makes a person beautiful when they're photographed. What actually makes a woman beautiful is what's on the inside. So right then and there, I resolved just to have fun with the photo shoot and being treated like a model for once in my life...I resolved that my photos would not be a display of outer beauty but inner beauty...and that's it for me. No more glamour shots after this...and hopefully no more fear of photos either.

"Charm is deceptive and beauty is fleeting, but a woman who fears the Lord is to be praised"