The life of a dog

I am like a dog whose owner doesn't love him and kicks him all the time...and yet, the dog always comes back for more. Am I a masochist that I should do this to myself? It's easy to say that I'm over it and I don't care anymore...but yet my mind and actions betray me. I can't sleep and my heart continues to bleed as each hour passes by and there's no response...

The owner doesn't care what condition his dog is in...so why should the dog even care about the owner anymore? I know it's not a lack of self-esteem...for the dog knows it doesn't deserve to be treated this way...so the question is, why?

I'm worried that as a result of this experience, I will do either 1 of 2 things.
1) I will continue to seek out relationships that are like this one and continue to receive treatment like this (just like abused women seem to always gravitate towards those kinds of men)
2) I will overcompensate, land on the other extreme and end up treating someone else like the way I was treated.

Am I being a bit dramatic? Perhaps. Do I think too much? At this point, yes. And yet it is the reality of my life right now. I can block it out for most of the time...just like the dog can go away for most of the day but at the end of the day, it always comes back and it gets kicked again.
I can only hold onto the hope that one day, my heart will no longer have anymore blood to lose and then the dog can no longer go back...cause it's dead.
I also hope that once this dog dies, that when and if the owner gets another dog, that the new dog will be loved and cherished and that the owner will be able to find love and joy with this new dog and freedom from this vicious cycle. The dog's death cannot in and of itself cause any of these things to happen and so it feels helpless in its situation...May the Almighty God restore this dog after its death and also give this owner a new life. That is my only hope.